why we went for baby #3

I vividly remember sitting in our bathroom a few days after coming home from the hospital with Zoey and begging Brook to never, ever EVER let me get pregnant again. I was miserable. I had just suffered through a really tough 9 months. The only positive was the perfect baby girl I was holding in my arms.

A few months went by. I was still sure I was done. We applied for our adoption. And were denied. My hubby had just started a brand new job, brand new career. I was devastated about not moving forward with our adoption. One evening, we were sitting in the kitchen and Brook told me he wasn’t ready to be done having our own. We have two beautiful baby girls. How can we just stop blessing the world with these awesome kids?

In March I sat down with three women who I respect and trust. I told them my fears and concerns with having another baby. You see, I was VERY sick with both pregnancies. With my 1st – I threw up until I was 32 weeks. I was working full time, most weeks 50-60 hours a week. It was exhausting. And then I carried her until 42 weeks. With my second? I start puking 2 days after conception. And I couldn’t keep anything down for almost 16 weeks. Awful. Again. I will never forget the night they prayed over me. I left that room with complete belief I can be healed from my sickness. I had a peace. A peace I had never felt in my pregnancies.

I went home and told hubby I was ready.

I felt God was telling me He had a big plan for this baby. And His plan is better than mine.

He will take care of me and carry me through.

I am clinging to that promise every single day. And praising Him for this little blessing. My attitude toward this pregnancy is completely different than it has been with my first two.

I’m filled with joy. Filled with peace.

I look at this about 20 billion times a day. Is this for real, yo?

Wow. So real.

Comments

  1. First off, I am thrilled for you! I know that yearning. And I also know how terrifying and awful a hard pregnancy can be. I was adamant when pregnant with Oscar I could never do it again. I couldn’t get from my bed to the bathroom without puking for 13 weeks, and barely functioned until 21 weeks when I finally got antiemetic medication. I had hyperemesis and the thought of doing it all again was more terrifying than anything else. Yet when Oscar was only 3 months old that yearning for another kicked in. So I totally get why you’re doing it all again!

    For us, there are added health issues that made us make the decision to never have another baby of our own. However terrifying another pregnancy is to me, this decision is heartbreaking. I still cannot swear it will be my same choice in 5 years time. That yearning is still there. But remembering to trust God has a plan for me has helped me find some peace. Faith got me through my last pregnancy, it got me through the dark times with Tim’s depression and even the times I was angry at God for giving me this yearning but making it all so hard, and has brought me to see what I am meant to take from it all.

    You’ll get through whatever the pregnancy throws at you because you have the greatest supporter in the world! And if you want to talk anytime if you do get sick then remember I’m always just a click away xx

    • Thank you as always for your support and encouragement!!! And I will be there for you if you walk this road again!!! There is so much joy that comes in it, I was just struggling to see it before!

  2. I am so excited for you! I’m glad you have a peace about it this time around as well. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it :)
    My pregnancies are great, but it’s the after that scares me. We want to have another as well, but the first few months of no sleep, baby blues, and breast feeding are hard. But When I look back I know it’s only a brief moment in time for they will be grown and gone before we know it.

    • So true! I dread those sleepless nights, but (hopefully) it’s just for a short time, and rest comes again!! It’s not easy, but there is something about having a super fun 2 year old now that makes it so much easier! I know it’s getting more and more fun so I can handle the difficulties!!

  3. Believing God with you for his peace and his blessing on this pregnancy. Babies were meant to be a blessing! No part of the experience should make us miserable. Love you.

    • You couldn’t be more right!!! I hate that I didn’t enjoy my previous pregnancies more, I’m gonna soak in every moment of this one!

  4. Will this baby be a surprise?

  5. So exciting. Our #3 was a total surprise, so I looked at that test a hundred times. Then I cried. I feel guilty about crying but I was scared. Now, with 5 weeks left, I’m so excited. Still scared, but less now. :)

  6. Love it. I have been contemplating number 3… just not sure.

  7. My first pregnancy was horrible and second was great! This third one is in between!! Praying that you have wonderful pregnancy and birth!! That baby is so worth everything you go through!!

  8. AHH! Congrats! Bless you for having the courage and strength to put your life in the hands of God and have #3! pregnancies are terrifying after you have one that wasn’t as enjoyable as other people’s experiences. I too was sick through mine with gestational diabetes. After my c-section, I thought death was knocking on my door. I am terrified to try for another, knowing that I have little ones to take care of. Thanks for this post! It was very nice to read

    • Thank you for your sweet encouragement! It is hard, but I’m at peace and know that God is in control! WOO!

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